We are on the countdown to baby boy. I am 38 weeks and have had a pretty easy pregnancy again. I am blessed to not have complications during my pregnancies, so far and have a really great doctor. I have gained weight of course, which worried for me about the first 30 weeks. Not kidding. But I have come to realize it is the reality of pregnancy and my body needs more. So I let go of feeling bad about any weight gain and have embraced it. Currently I am up 30lbs, which is within normal for a pregnancy, so I am not concerned. The doctor has never shown concern either, so I think we are good :) I did what is probably my last workout last night, after having gone a week without I was going a little crazy, so I decided to hop on the bike last night. While I felt better afterwards, I fully admit to being sore today.
I have to confess too, that I am beginning to get very nervous about having a third baby. Don't get wrong I am beyond excited too, but the realities of a third child under 4 are starting to set in. I am extremely thankful to be with my parents until Steven comes home, because I honestly don't know how I would do it alone. I know I would figure it out even if I weren't here, but knowing that I have help is definitely a relief.
One thing that is helping me right now is a book I just started reading. When I say just, I mean I just started it today. I've read 1 chapter. But I really like that first chapter. It's called No More Perfect Moms by Jill Savage. I just finished a devotional of hers called Real Moms, Real Jesus, which I would highly recommend. But anyways, this first chapter really hit home for me. It talks about how we have to let go of the idea of being a perfect Mom and realize we are not alone in our imperfection. She created a list of things that you are not alone it. Some of my favorites are:
"You are not the only mom who yelled at your children today."
"You are not the only mom who constantly battles a weight issue."
"You are not the only mom who is critical of her husband."
"You are not the only mom who who can't seem to keep up with the laundry and the house."
"You are not the only mom who sometimes wants to run away."
Her whole list is much longer. I have read blogs like this before, but I never tire of them. Because the truth is I do forget I'm not alone. I look at the other moms at the store, at church, on pinterest, or on facebook and see everything all together and sometimes think why am I not like that?? But the truth is we all have our imperfect parts. Every mom has her imperfections. We all fall short at being able to do it all. We all get frustrated and angry and upset. Don't be fooled you are not alone.
So here are my additions to the "You are not the only mom" list.
You are not the only mom who has turned on cartoons so you can have a little quiet.
You are not the only mom who has faked having to pee, so you can have 2 minutes to yourself.
You are not the only mom who has sat in the bathroom crying because you just need it.
You are not the only mom who has been in tears because you can't make the baby stop crying.
You are not the only mom who wonders if she has enough to give to her children.
You are not the only mom who has served hot dogs, chicken nuggets, or pancakes for dinner multiple nights in a row because you just want your child to eat.
You are not the only mom who has left a cart full of groceries because your child is throwing a fit.
You are not the only mom who wrestled a screaming toddler into a car seat because you wouldn't give in.
You are not the only mom who has let their kids play too much iPad or video games because it's not worth the fight some days.
You are not the only mom who doesn't want to read the same book for the twentieth time today.
You are not the only mom who to promise a cookie if they will just eat the broccoli.
You are not the only mom to look in the mirror and wonder where your old self went.
You are not the only mom who wants a vacation, alone.
You are not the only mom who has left the house with spit up on shirt, sometimes knowingly.
You are not the only mom to oount the hours till bedtime.
You are not the only mom to breathe a sigh of relief when the kids are in bed.
You are not the only mom to wonder how you will make it through tomorrow.
You are not the only mom to promise a tummy ache will go away if the child will just go to sleep.
You are not the only mom to feel like you have no idea what you are doing. The truth that I haev discovered in my three years as a mom and from talking to other moms and dads, is that no parent knows what they are doing. No parent gets it right every time. We are all just faking our great knowledge with our kids some days. Even those really great parents you see who have seemingly perfect children who are always behaved and in line will, when honest with you, tell you that is not how it always is. Life is messy and so are kids.
You are not alone in your frustration and hard times as a mom. I promise.
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